 |
A recent photo of Alice
She performs with her whole heart! |
When I fell in love with Mario, I fell hard.
Anyone who has a true love knows the day that you realize
that it is real. There is a lock-down in
your heart and new language. "He's the one! This is it!" Mario was the most incredible man and I
wanted more than anything to be his wife.
My parents had a beautiful marriage and I wanted one just
like theirs. I learned the tools from
them: respect, tenderness, sacrifice, love, discipline, and oneness. If you give of yourself, you can share your
life and dreams with someone special.
As much as I thought I had it down, I never was able to make
it work with anyone. My first real try at a long-term relationship produced a beautiful baby, but proved to be otherwise fruitless. Mario had also been married before and was not able to make it work. When we brought our
hopes and dreams --as well as our kids--into a relationship, we were hoping for the best.
The two of us, single parents to great kids, met for coffee
or diner and had wonderful, emotional connections where I gazed across the
table into his beautiful brown eyes and listened. He was the wisest, most beautiful person I
had ever met and he wanted to build a future.
He had a plan.
"If I ever get
married again," he told me,
"it will be to my Alice."
He had to explain.
Mario told me about the relationship between his father (a Broadway
actor) Chev Rogers had with his wife (Mario's "step-mom"), Alice
Evans. Alice was Chev's refuge from the
storms in life. She was also the most
exciting person in Chev's life. With
Alice, things were open and honest, safe and secure, challenging and filled
with color.
 |
Sweet Charity Original Broadway cast
Alice fourth from the left |
Alice was also a Broadway
actress, and could even break glass with her powerful voice. She and Chev had met on the National Tour of
Sound Of Music and became inseparable.
Their lives were one dream after another--and they adored each
other. They played hard, loved hard,
fought hard and weren't afraid of truth and hard times.
Yes, if he ever married again, it would be to his Alice.
I remember feeling threatened by the comparison. How could I be like the Alice he was looking
at as the epitome of true-love? A
Broadway Dame with a big voice, a gorgeous face and head-shots that changed
with each show she was in? I was insecure,
a single mom, vulnerable and desperately in love with the "perfect" Mario.
I went home from one of our coffee shop chats and wrote a
poem I called "Your Alice".
The next day at work I gave it to him.
Looking at it now, I remember exactly how I felt:
Looking in your
face I see
The warmth of what
was meant to be.
Listening to words
you say
Speaking of one
special day
When things will
just fall into place
With one perfect
face...
How can another
feeling be-
So full of longing
(you and me)
Than my need to be
seen as real?
For you to match
the way I feel?
In silence, how
this feeling bleeds
Surpassing all my
wants and needs.
One face…
What shape? What look? What kind?
Tell me… and I’ll make it mine.
How I wish that
you could see-
Your Alice come to
life in me,
The peace in what
you’re speaking of
I long for too:
undying love.
The next day, Mario asked to see outside. "Your poem," he said, with tears in
his eyes. "Where did you learn to
write like that? The last line...it's
just how I feel."
I was flooded with relief. And love. Not only did Mario love me, he loved my
writing. From there on in, we made plans
toward marriage.
Mario decided to take me on vacation with him and his boys
that summer. They were headed to New
York City to see Chev and Alice. I
needed some preparation and decided to ask Cynthia, Mario’s Mother, what to
expect.
"Alice is wonderful," Cynthia told me, taking a
long drag on her cigarette. "And Chev is horrible. Just horrible.” I giggled.
Cynthia never minced words. I was
used to two peaceful parents, living a middle-class life side-by-side and never
saying anything remotely insulting about each other.
“I’m not kidding,” Cynthia said. “He’s hard to live with. Just the most ego-maniacal man ever born!"
Chev, the way Mario described him, was larger-than-life. An artist and an actor, he lived life by his
terms. Mario never exaggerated or
lied. Secondly, I had never heard an
ex-wife speak so well of the new wife.
 |
| Chev with Mario 1987 |
"That's because she really is an angel," Cindy,
Mario's sister later told me. Cindy had
a special connection with Alice (even Alice called Cindy one of her favorite
people). "She is beautiful, inside
and out! I wish I could go with you!”
By the time Mario and I boarded our plane bound for NYC, I
was so nervous. I would be meeting the
"new" in-laws, Broadway actors who were larger than life.
Arriving in New York City, June 1987, at nearly midnight, we
had to go through Harlem to get to the West End of Manhattan, where Chev and
Alice lived. Chev answered the door
looking every bit the Broadway star he was... and I'm sure capitalizing on my
sheepishness.
"So this is Janet," he said, in a booming, deep
voice, stretching his arms out for a hug. I smiled, and hugged him, hitting my
cheek against a plastic stop-watch hanging from his neck. We made our way through the kitchen and into
a wide, open living area with a grand piano and crown moldings and a hanging
chandelier. I scanned the room for
Alice, but Chev told me she was in bed.
How dare she?? After all, it was
only 12:30... and I'm sure she was used to partying until dawn.
While Chev offered us drinks, Mario insisted we put the boys
down to bed, and we began the process.
While we set up beds, I saw more "realistic" pictures of Alice
around the room. They looked like a
normal couple, not so much the larger-than-life version I had made them to be,
but rather like my own mom and dad, with family, baby pictures, holiday shots.
Somehow I slept that night, and when I awoke, it was to
Mario stirring to go to the bathroom. He
walked outside, and was greeting by an excited yell, followed by a laugh. I could hear the hugging from where I was.
Mario giggled and Alice continued a melodious laugh... one that I was strangely
jealous of.
I got out of bed, got dressed, looked for makeup, gave up
and then walked outside. There she
was. She was...so small. Somehow she wasn't so "Broadway
sized", she was even smaller than me.
She turned around and gave me the most disarming smile I had ever been
greeted with. I blushed, and hugged her,
as she said "So this is Janet."
Alice made me feel welcome and told me quickly that she had
heard all about me. She wanted to know
more and we connected in the beautiful living room, a baby grand piano in its
center and pictures of family hanging on its cream-colored walls.
 |
| Alice and I - that week in NYC |
Throughout the week, Alice's beauty became real to me. The perfect image I made of her broke away
and I was able to see her in the warm and real place that she lived. She was genuinely full of love for most
everyone we talked about. She asked real
questions about me, about my family. And
she loved my poem.
"Honey," she said, in her gorgeous voice,
"your poem is a treasure. I wrote
it down here in my journal, see?" I smiled, so humbled that she would save
this. "I am just so glad Mario has
met you. He needs a woman who really can
see him."
Saying goodbye after the week was over was a little sad, but
I was ready to get back home. As she hugged me, she whispered "And you, my
dear, are a delight!" She meant
it. It meant the world to me, and I
thought about her the whole trip home.
At the end of the year, Mario and I got married. We had our own passion, our own drama, and
our own obstacles we somehow overcame.
The following year we had a daughter and named her Alicia, the name that
Chev called Alice.
 |
| Alice and Alicia |
Today is Alice's birthday.
I cannot begin to tell you how blessed we are to call her family. To have her in our lives means that we have a
woman who values us and accepts us regardless of all our shortcomings. She is always ready to bless us, encourage us
in sad times and celebrate the happy times.
She is a delight and a treasure.
Over the years, Alice has earned the place in my heart that
she already had in the hearts of our family – as a treasured, irreplaceable treasure. But I like to think we have a special
connection, one that has been tested by time and circumstance. One that is not afraid of intimacy or
questions – I am a better person for knowing her.
Blessings and love, dear Alice. I love you deeply!
